By Julie Leonard
Feeling stressed, or having high levels of perceived stress puts our body into fight-or-flight mode. We trigger our stress response, and our body has to shut down unnecessary functions to optimise performance, i.e run away, fight or freeze. What this means for our bodies is that we release the stress hormone, cortisol. Cortisol is an important hormone secreted by our adrenal gland, and regulates our blood pressure, glucose metabolism, insulin release, immunity function, and inflammatory response. However, if we go through a prolonged period of stress or live in a persistent state of stress, too much cortisol is released, and it can have an adverse effect on us. Too much cortisol increases our heart rate and blood pressure. It increases sugars (glucose) in our bloodstream, decreases our immunity, decreases bone density, increases abdominal fat, suppresses our inflammatory response, reduces muscle density, and suppresses thyroid function. And over time, this is really bad for our health.
The good news is that I will share with you four powerful, yet simple, tools to combat your stress levels.
1. Self-care
Even though I’m extremely busy, and even though I sometimes feel guilty that I should be doing something else, what I have learned over the thirty years I have supported women is that self-care isn’t selfish. It’s essential. Self-care nourishes my mind, body, and spirit. And self-care makes me not only more productive, but it also makes me a better mama, partner, friend, colleague, and neighbor. Self-care reduces my stress levels, reduces the worry and anxiety, calms my mind, improves my mood; I’m less irritated, less short-tempered and much more fun! It supports me to be the best version of myself.
Self-care is more than bubble baths and manicures. Of course, pampering ourselves and making time for these kinds of activities is really important. Anything that gives us a bit of me-time ,and makes us feel relaxed and/or beautiful, should be a regular occurrence.
However, self-care goes beyond these often practical ideas. Self-care is also about nurturing our soul, our emotional health, and our personal development. During a recent discussion in my Happiness Club, many members described how they nurture their mind, body and spirit with practices that included reading, listening to audiobooks and podcasts, massages, energy work, exercise, yoga, facials, talking to a Coach regularly, breathing exercises, meditation, setting boundaries, journaling, reflection time, and having alone time, plenty of ideas for you to explore for yourself. Many also talked about deepening authentic relationships and support from others in similar situations. Therefore, support also seems to be an essential part of self-care.
An important point that was also discussed is that everyone is an individual and with specific needs, so you should choose the self-care practices and routines that work for you and that you enjoy.
2. Breathe
Simple, yet effective. Research shows us that just one or two minutes of mindful breathing can have a huge impact on our stress levels. When we are stressed, we often breathe more rapidly and in only our chests, rather than slower, deeper breaths. A breathing meditation can slow down and deepen our breathing, calm our minds, reduce our overwhelmedness, and lower our stress levels.
I’ve created a powerful two minute breathing meditation for you, and even though it is short it is highly effective. Try it. It’s just two minutes out of your day!
3. Gratitude
Our human brains have a tendency to focus on the negatives. Did you know that it takes FIVE positive comments to counteract ONE negative comment? It seems that people find it much easier to tune into negative things than into positive ones. And this is one of the contributing factors to our stress. One of the areas I often start with when I am coaching a client is to listen to the language that they use. So many times the women I work with talk in absolutes. Everything. Nothing. Nobody. Everything went wrong today, Nobody loves me, Nothing ever goes right for me… But often they are not aware they are doing it. In over thirty years of supporting clients, I have never found these statements to be true. It is often how the person feels, but when we take a closer look, it’s not completely true.
The practice of gratitude is an effective way to begin to shift your negative thinking, and to remove those absolutes. When you feel that everything went wrong today, or that the day was awful, taking a few minutes to think about something positive in the day that you are thankful for can shift your mindset into a more positive one. It also helps you sleep better and wake up the next day in a more positive mood.
And don’t just take my word for it. The world’s leading expert on gratitude is Dr. Robert Emmons, a professor of psychology at the University of California who has carried out research that links the practice of gratitude to living a happier and less stressful life. What we know from research is that daily gratitude can have a deep and far-reaching effect on our lives. People who practice gratitude regularly:
● Report a higher level of happiness than those who do not
● Have closer and more meaningful relationships
● Live more in the present moment and are more mindful
● Are kinder and more compassionate
● Are more resilient in stressful situations
● Are more focused on the positives in their lives
● Have a strong and positive mindset
● Have a more balanced perspective and dwell less on first world problems
● Are physically and mentally healthier
Wow! All of this from writing down a few words each day!
So adopt an Attitude of Gratitude. Buy a nice notebook and pen, and embrace one of the simplest ways to decrease stress and increase your happiness.
4. Self Kindness
Practicing positive self talk can help decrease negative thinking, which in turn reduces our levels of perceived stress. We can often show kindness, compassion, and understanding to our family, friends, and colleagues, yet struggle to speak to ourselves with the same kindness.
From my personal experience and my extensive work supporting women with negative thinking and limiting beliefs, I know that cultivating a practice of self compassion is a powerful tool to train your brain to become more positive.
One simple way to do this is to try talking to yourself like your own best friend. To begin to talk to yourself with the same kindness and compassion as you talk with your best friend.
I have created a 21-Day Self Compassion Journey that has proven to be highly effective in increasing women’s self compassion levels.
Über Moms can enjoy a discount on the normal price of 47€ and join for 29€! Simply email me at hello@julieleonardcoaching.com and quote Über Moms to enroll on the next course.
Julie Leonard
Julie Leonard is a Life Coach, aromatherapist, seminar facilitator and speaker with over 25 years of experience in psychology, health and coaching. She is from Scotland and is currently based in Munich. Her passion is happiness and supporting women all over the world to transform themselves and their lives in order to live to their full potential and happiness. Check out her business here and remember that Über Moms benefit from a 10% discount on Life Coaching sessions.